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I have always loved Meat Loaf, particularly Bat Out Of Hell II. Jim Steinman prologues the track 'Everything Louder Than Everything Else' with this short narration/sound collage that I always loved. I decided to pay tribute by having my friend Alan record the narration, and providing the backing sounds. It turned out to be more than an apt introduction to my new EP.
I remember everything.
I remember every little thing as if it only happened yesterday.
I was barely seventeen, and I once killed a boy with a Fender guitar.
I don't remember if it was a...Telecaster or Stratocaster, but I do remember that had a heart of chrome and a voice like a horny angel.
I don't remember if it was a Telecaster or a Stratocaster but I do remember that it wasn't at all easy.
It required the perfect combination of the right power chords and the precise angle from which to strike!
The guitar bled for...about a week afterwards, and the blood was zoot, dark and rich like wild berries.
The blood of the guitar was CHUCK BERRY RED.
The guitar bled for about a week afterwards, but it run out beautifully, and I was able to play notes that I'd never even heard before!
So I took my guitar...
I SMASHED IT AGAINST THE WALL!
I SMASHED IT AGAINST THE FLOOR!
I SMASHED IT AGAINST THE BODY OF A VARSITY CHEERLEADER!
I SMASHED IT AGAINST THE HOOD OF A CAR!
I SMASHED IT AGAINST A 1981 HARLEY DAVIDSON!
THE HARLEY HOWLED IN PAIN...
THE GUITAR HOWLED IN HEAT...
And I ran upstairs to my parent's bedroom.
Mummy and Daddy were sleeping quietly, in the moonlight.
Slowly, I opened the door...
Creeping in the shadows, right up to the foot of their bed...
I raised the guitar, high above my head
AND JUST AS I WAS ABOUT TO BRING THE GUITAR
CRASHING DOWN UPON THE CENTER OF THE BED
MY FATHER WOKE UP SCREAMING:
WAIT A MINUTE!
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!
THAT'S NO WAY TO TREAT AN EXPENSIVE MUSICAL INSTRUMENT!!"
And I said,
"GOD DAMN IT, DADDY!
You know I love you...
BUT YOU'VE GOT A HELL OF A LOT TO LEARN ABOUT ROCK AND ROLL!"